"Oasis - Standing on the Shoulder of Giants" My Life Was Better Before This Album

    I was tempted to start off this review with the entire lyrics to Wonderwall, which would be pretty funny, and I'm still contemplating doing it, but also I think that perfectly describes exactly how I feel about this band. I know nothing about them other than Wonderwall, and like one other song I heard in a TV show somewhere. Actually I know that they broke up because this band is two brothers who just always constantly fought with each other, and one of these Gallagher blokes is pretty funny on twitter. Either way, that's why when my friend Omaid suggested this album I groaned as one does, especially considering how people have rated this album. And frankly, I listened to the first track and just don't get it at all. Even still, I'm in a good mood, which gives this album a fighting chance, so without further ado, my track-by-track review.

Standing on the Shoulder of Giants - Oasis

Fuckin' in the Bushes - 25/100 I listened to about 80% of this song before realizing it's just one giant blue ball and it's all buildup, because reasons? Like it didn't sound awful it was the first 20 seconds of an actual good song. Except it wasn't? How is it one of the most popular songs on this album?

Go Let It Out - 50/100 This song is just, fine? It's pretty inoffensive but I don't have any particular biases towards or against Oasis which in this rare case I think works against this song really popping off in my mind. Like is this really the most popular song from this album?

Who Feels Love? - 40/100 This song reminds me of the time I saw Sam Roberts band play their biggest album, except it was out of order. I mean this in the most unflattering way possible. I am not feeling love, I am not feeling anything.

Put Yer Money Where Yer Mouth Is - 35/100 The more boring this album gets the more I'm punishing the score for the next songs this should not be boring me as much as it does.

Little James - 50/100 You know what I think this song is pretty big step up from the other two songs. At the very least I can say it made me want to listen to it.

Gas Panic! - 45/100 What compelled them to make this song six minutes long? I just, don't get it, like at all in any capacity. 

Where Did It All Go Wrong? - 40/100 What happened to that really British dude? This doesn't even sound like Oasis anymore. Booooooo.

Sunday Morning Call - 30/100 Huh?

I Can See a Liar - 25/100 I am regretting this all. It's all just so bland and boring.

Roll It Over - 20/100 I really felt him when he said leave me here.

Final Score: 36/100

    I'm writing this closing paragraph before I'm even done this album because frankly it's that bad. I hate it. Omaid why did you make me listen to this album? Why did I agree to this in the first place? It just makes no sense at all. They must be standing on the shoulders of the shortest giant of all time, because I can't see anything redeeming about this album. It's just one massive turd. Today is gonna be the day That they're gonna throw it back to you By now you should've somehow Realized what you gotta do I don't believe that anybody Feels the way I do about you now Backbeat, the word is on the street That the fire in your heart is out I'm sure you've heard it all before But you never really had a doubt I don't believe that anybody feels The way I do about you now And all the roads we have to walk are winding And all the lights that lead us there are blinding There are many things that I would Like to say to you But I don't know how Because maybe You're gonna be the one that saves me And after all You're my wonderwall Today was gonna be the day But they'll never throw it back to you By now you should've somehow Realized what you're not to do I don't believe that anybody Feels the way I do About you now And all the roads that lead you there were winding And all the lights that light the way are blinding There are many things that I would like to say to you But I don't know how I said maybe You're gonna be the one that saves me And after all You're my wonderwall I said maybe (I said maybe) You're gonna be the one that saves me And after all You're my wonderwall I said maybe (I said maybe) You're gonna be the one that saves me (saves me) You're gonna be the one that saves me (saves me) You're gonna be the one that saves me (saves me).

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